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Sorry, We Tried.
The Honey Heist Goes Off the Rails
In this grizzly episode of Sorry, We Tried, the guys continue their session with a new tabletop RPG— Honey Heist. In this game, it’s HoneyCon 2024. You are going to undertake the greatest heist the world has ever seen. There are two things you need to know. One: You have a complex plan that requires precise timing. Two: You're a FREAKING BEAR. In part two of the trilogy, the bears try their hardest to get across a lake so they can break into Bee Headquarters and get the vault access codes. At least, that was the plan before one bear took it upon himself to take the whole thing off the rails...
Also in this episode, Teddy tries to take control. Feednork pees down a tree. Colonel Mustard takes himself hostage. And the guys lose their minds after the real villain of the story is revealed.
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Ladies and gentlemen, put on your listening ears, your thinking caps and a fresh pair of socks Coming to you live from area 51 and three quarters. Here is Sorry, we Tried.
Robot Voice:That wasn't too bad.
Robby:That's the one that might be fun.
Robot Voice:Previously on Sorry, we Tried.
Spencer:In this game, in Honey Heist, the premise is that it is HoneyCon 2024. You are going to undertake the greatest heist the world has ever seen. Two things One, you have a complex plan that requires precise timing and two, you are a bear. No accent, bare bones. My name is FeedNork, spelled F-E-E spelled f-e-e-d-n-o-r-k. Feednork, to recap bee costumes. Gas tanker sneak past the gate and then you said you wanted to interrogate somebody and torture them. I'm now told that extra police presence is en route to the event to ensure its safety and they unlock the gate. It goes, and then the gates open up wide. You guys pull your tanker inside.
Robby:We've got the badge from the ex-president of the United States, we can go anywhere.
Spencer:Yeah, the United States of B-America.
Robby:We can go anywhere To the B-Public which it stands.
Cayson:One nation.
Spencer:Under B.
Robby:Under comb Okay.
Spencer:So you guys, you've got it.
Robby:Divisible by hexagons.
Spencer:With liberty and peace for all. You walk out of the bunkhouse. No, I'm sorry, you walk out of the mess hall. So near you you've got the bunkhouses. There's that camping area, but in order to get to Pachinac Lodge you're going to have to get across the water. This is a poorly designed area.
Robby:But it looks like there's very clearly land as an option.
Spencer:Yeah, could we not just walk along Highway 13 to the other entrance?
Robby:We don't even have to go out there.
Spencer:I guess we could walk across the trees For the sake of making things interesting.
Robby:Over there by the shack. We just go that way.
Spencer:For the sake of making things interesting. You can't, you can't do either.
Robby:That makes no sense. We can go by the shack and you can make the shack interesting.
Spencer:It's fenced off.
Robby:But there's no fence on the map. You have to go across the water?
Spencer:What? Is the point of this map.
Cayson:Is there a boat? There are boats.
Spencer:Of course there's canoes and stuff. Let's go grab a boat, okay, so you'll have to steal a canoe, perfect.
Cayson:That's the only option, so hold on.
Spencer:So you can steal a canoe I can see sick, which would be a criminal check or you can swim, and that would be a bear check.
Cayson:Let's do the bear check.
Spencer:So you guys are all going to have to roll, oh, oh.
Robby:Do we all have to roll for both of?
Spencer:them Well.
Robby:Cason you're screwed.
Robot Voice:Can I carry everyone on my back? You may need to try to steal or is there one person who can steal them?
Cayson:Wait, can I carry them both on my back and then do one roll for all of them?
Spencer:Well, so if you're going to swim, all of you are going to have to roll. If you're have to roll, to steal the canoe.
Cayson:Oh.
Spencer:What if two of us want to swim and one of us wants to steal the canoe because our stats are offset? That'd be too many dice rolls for me to jack off.
Robby:What we could do for the criminal check is collectively, we have to get nine or below.
Spencer:No.
Robby:Yeah.
Spencer:That's not how this works you said no.
Robby:Yes, it is, you said no.
Spencer:I just said no, it's gotta be individual.
Robby:That makes no sense. It's gotta be individual Because we're working together as a team.
Spencer:At that point, yes, but if you're all swimming individually, then you can't.
Robby:Right, and then if we're stealing a boat together, that's a collective task. No, it's one at a time that makes no sense, I don't freaking care, we're all in the same boat. Together we're stealing different boats. Okay, let's just do it.
Spencer:Either way.
Harrison:That's stupid. Who was going to steal the canoe? Okay, wait, hold on. I want to see our stats.
Cayson:I want to see our stats. We don't have stats. Harrison is at three for both.
Spencer:Robbie, you're at three for both. Cason, you're at four and two.
Cayson:Okay so.
Spencer:Correction if Cason does a criminal.
Robby:No, I'm screwed. I have two for criminal. He's got to get two or less. You have two criminal. I thought you had. He's a two for criminal and a four for bear.
Spencer:So, okay, but if he did bear correctly, then he gets one back in the criminal.
Harrison:Or does he get one back in the bear?
Spencer:It would balance back if he got a criminal action correctly. But that means he'd have to swim if you were going to do it.
Cayson:Well, no One of us has to steal the canoe.
Spencer:Yeah, I'm saying you should not be the one to do it.
Harrison:Yeah, exactly, no, sir.
Spencer:No, sir, I don't know what's wrong with you. It's Macy leaving. Okay, harrison's between you and me.
Harrison:Go for it.
Spencer:No, I just did the chip. It's your turn, buddy. Okay, this canoe without being spotted. Also, you can terrify, so I guess you.
Robby:Is there anybody around us?
Spencer:No, not right now, but there are guards, sort of just like in the vicinity.
Robby:Okay.
Spencer:But they're not like right next to you right now.
Robby:Six. You got way over dog. This is not good.
Spencer:Okay, so that means you are at four for bear and two for criminal.
Cayson:Looks like we're swimming boys.
Spencer:So you try to steal it Well.
Robby:I'll have to roll again for that.
Spencer:So Teddy tries to steal a canoe, but then he slips and falls and accidentally knocks over a bunch of different paddles and stuff and makes a really loud noise. So the guards are alerted. A couple of guards buzz over and fly over. Hey, what's going on here? Buzz, buzz. So what?
Robot Voice:are you going to do?
Cayson:Just hang it around, just hang it around.
Harrison:Well, we were testing out the canoe equipment. Brother you Harrison is trying to solo this entire game.
Spencer:No.
Cayson:Nobody else is doing anything no.
Spencer:Kern and I are hiding behind a tree buddy. You are stealing the canoe by yourself.
Cayson:I'm not hiding behind a tree. I'm pretending to be a tree.
Spencer:Your skill is climbing. Can you give me a bear check To see if you can climb up the tree to escape? You get to roll this twice. That means you have to.
Cayson:Is he going to rescue us?
Spencer:Are we going to go to jail? You have two chances to get a three or below To see if you can climb up this tree. So you have two chances.
Cayson:What does he need?
Spencer:A three or below. I got it. I got a two on the second one. Okay nice. So uh Feed Nork scampers up the tree.
Robby:Suckers.
Spencer:Did I just see a bee climb a?
Robby:tree.
Spencer:They can fly. Teddy and Colonel Mustard are still on the ground.
Cayson:Quick question for you what do these guards look like? Not bamboo.
Spencer:Dang it. So Robbie is, or Feednork is, just a bandit to you, basically.
Cayson:I'd like to jump into the lake and try and swim across.
Spencer:You know what I mean. Hey, no, sir, you're not going to try to convince the guards to go, you're going to make it so obvious you're guilty.
Cayson:I'm hoping that they'll take out guns and shoot me as I go across the river.
Spencer:Okay, so to swim, that's a bear check. So you've got to get a four or below. I have to pee, so just let me guys know.
Harrison:Feednork has to pee in the tree.
Cayson:Feednork is pissing down the tree.
Harrison:I'm so scared I peed myself.
Spencer:Okay, kacen, you gotta get a Colonel Mustard. Give me a four or below. It's Kern Kern. Give me a four or below. I got a three. Nice, alright. So.
Cayson:That's the first dice roll I have ever succeeded. Yeah, Okay.
Spencer:I'm going to put this.
Cayson:I'm going to set your stats back.
Spencer:right Case is now back in balance. You can put it on the dresser You're back at three and three. Colonel Mustard yeah, that's fine.
Cayson:Wait, I thought I had to succeed in a criminal act to balance them.
Spencer:No, so you succeeded in bear. Does that mean, oh wait? No, hold on. That just means you're right. Oh God, your bear is at five, let's go.
Robby:And your criminal's at one. You're going feral Now. It's nigh impossible for you to come back from that. You'd have to roll a one on a criminal check. Yes, sir.
Spencer:Okay, big grief. I think Cason's going to be our first casualty here.
Cayson:Yep, wait, so I die if I become a bear. No, you go, feral, he's going to go feral and cause all of us to die. Yeah, I'm cool with that.
Spencer:Take everybody out with you, Okay so.
Robby:That's what he wanted the whole time.
Spencer:Kern just bolts and swims across the river or across the lake. He makes it to the other side, but so Feednork is still in the tree. Kern has just swam across the lake. That was the fastest pace.
Cayson:I have ever seen Like your shower dude. So that just leaves.
Spencer:Really quickly. I'm sorry, I don't mean to cut you off. I need to understand how this works, because he did a bear task. He did a bear task.
Robot Voice:Successfully.
Spencer:That means that he lost a point from criminal and added it to bear Because he successfully completed the task, so he is now.
Robby:So he's five bear. Yeah, so he's going feral.
Spencer:So, theoretically, you would have to do a criminal task next and if you fail, you're done for You're dead. Yes, sir, or so if you, you can move a point from bear to criminal by doing a flashback to talk about how you planned the heist. Oh, okay, bet, that's gonna be I planned for this exact moment, but that can only be in a moment where we had to like we need a plan.
Cayson:Okay.
Spencer:So we'll hold that in reserve for right now. I'm going to need a flashback real soon, buddy. So Feed'n'Ork and Teddy are still on the wrong side of the lake. Colonel Mustard is clear on the other side. Yes sir, did he happen to end up with the scanner before he left?
Robot Voice:No, because you had that.
Spencer:We didn't pass it off. No, that's unfortunate. So you and Teddy still have to figure out a way to get past these guards and get across the lake. Well, I think it's more of Teddy's problem right now, because he's currently dealing with the authorities.
Robot Voice:No, I'm done now.
Spencer:But I'm watching from the top of this tree. So, Teddy, you have a four in bear and a two in criminal right now.
Cayson:Mm-hmm.
Spencer:Your skill is intimidation or terrify.
Harrison:Yeah.
Spencer:So that would be a bear. Actually, depending on how you use it, it would either be bear or criminal.
Robby:Mm-hmm. Actually, depending on how you use it, it would either be bear or criminal. So what do you want to do? I'm going to look at them and say something along the lines of.
Harrison:Teddy requested a special delivery and I was trying to use these Don boats.
Robby:Your name is Teddy. Oh, barry, that's right.
Harrison:Barry requested a special delivery.
Spencer:The story is not coming together, buddy.
Harrison:We're trying to use these boats to deliver it to him, and now it's all falling over. What kind of operation is this?
Spencer:Okay, so you're not going to use your terrifying skill at all.
Harrison:So it's persuasion.
Robby:I hadn't gotten there yet. I was seeing if they were going to respond or not.
Spencer:That would sound like you're going to have to roll a criminal check buddy, because that sounded like you were trying to persuade.
Robby:I wasn't trying to persuade anything. I was making a statement to see how they respond.
Spencer:Okay, I'll give you this one. He will eat that you have to go get that by he we don't mean.
Cayson:My child will eat that. The dog, not harrison, I mean harrison might too, I don't know.
Spencer:Okay, so you want to. How are you gonna go for the terrify then?
Robby:you're just gonna try to scare him away I was gonna try to use barry's name to intimidate them. Be like, we have to get this done for barry.
Spencer:But that's not a terrify thing, that's more like so. You as a grizzly bear, your skill is to like scare people away with your grizzly bear Like Sully Right, like a roar perhaps.
Robby:Because, they're getting in the way of me completing this task for Barry that we were told to complete, and so they're making me angry and disappointing Barry.
Spencer:So can you just say that you're going to roar and scare them away?
Robby:Sure, because that's a bear thing. No, I'm not trying to do a bear thing, I'm trying to do a criminal thing.
Spencer:Sure, fine, fine. That means you've got to get a two-. Wait, stupid. That means you've got to get a two or below. I know, but it's either that or go feral. So you get two chances. Okay, you got a four the first time.
Robot Voice:You got a one, oh my god Clutch.
Spencer:So they're like oh, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, We'll leave you alone now.
Robby:And then they buzz off Nice. Now I grab a boat and I'm like feed Nork, Get down here. So you hop in the boat.
Spencer:So now the guards are gone, they believe your story so you don't have to worry about doing any checks to steal it. So feed Nork. Slithers down the tree, slithers. You guys hop in the boat together. You start paddling across right, so you get to the other side.
Robot Voice:You couldn't run. For no reason, buddy. He just got so scared that he was like uh, uh.
Spencer:The way I imagine that going down is while Teddy is talking to these guards, you just see in the background a blurred image of a bee diving into the water.
Cayson:And another bee running up the tree and peeing down Instant tedious. One thing bursts off the direction One pees itself and one just diving headfirst into a lake Like a competitive diver. Instantaneous one thing burst out of the direction, one being itself and one just diving head first into a lake like a competitive diver, like a swan except there was a lot of swans.
Spencer:So you guys, paddle over, you guys pull up. So the abandoned shack is currently being used sort of like a guard house. There's lots of armed guards.
Cayson:I'm giving you information right now, the abandoned shack is being used like a guard house.
Spencer:So you see, there's like a bunch of armed guards. That's not where we're going. I'm giving you information. Right now the abandoned shack is being used like a guard house. So you see there's like a bunch of armed guards buzzing in and out of the shack and going towards the lodge, so they're all circling around the lodge Quick question sorry, Do we have our jumper cables with us and our car battery? Did you swim across the river with a car battery?
Spencer:No Well if he would have had to do it in the water, he would not have been in the canoe.
Cayson:Someone in the canoe had it.
Spencer:I'm pretty sure this Were you carrying a car battery, the whole time We've got a bag with us.
Robby:Obviously it's been in my costume, yeah.
Spencer:Sure, you have your car battery.
Cayson:We, I can carry the jumper cables with me.
Robby:Those get wet. They look like a scarf. It doesn't matter if they get wet, it's just cables.
Spencer:I'll take your word, I guess.
Cayson:I hope you know this is the happiest I've ever been.
Spencer:The dog just jumped in Cason's lap. For the record, he's perched on you like a gargoyle, like he's Batman, or? Something Okay. So how are you guys going to get inside the lodge past the guards? Okay, let me give you some information.
Cayson:What does the lodge look like?
Spencer:So the lodge is a palatial estate. You look at it, there's dozens of rooms. There's only for the most important VIPs. What's?
Cayson:it made of VIBs.
Spencer:It's like a what kind of campground?
Cayson:It's like a cabin, like what kind of wood.
Spencer:Are you?
Robot Voice:going to set it on fire? I don't know, Wood.
Robby:What kind of wood Wood, I don't know, is it made of?
Cayson:metal. It's like a cabin Cabin. What kind of wood, I don't know, do bees make it out of like? Is it like a cedar wood? Is it like a bamboo?
Spencer:Can you put, is it?
Cayson:bamboo or is it cedar?
Spencer:It's not bamboo.
Cayson:Is it cedar?
Spencer:Have you ever seen a log cabin made of bamboo? I don't know what cedar.
Cayson:I've never seen bees make a log cabin.
Spencer:It's cedar Sure, I don't care.
Cayson:Okay, I bet that's going to smell great.
Spencer:So you see a dozen or so bee guards armed with their stingers and tiny pistols. I do have one more question. Hold on you. You hear the bees out front grumbling about how badly they want to join the party at the mess hall instead of guarding the boss. You also hear them mention that their camera system is still down for repairs. So a part of our tools that we brought over just because we did beforehand plan on kidnapping somebody, do we have?
Cayson:access to chloroform.
Spencer:You didn't mention that before, so no, but we also.
Robby:You said we knew we said car battery and a wrench. This and dynamite man I had a good idea okay, anyway so why don't we just tell them that the queen told us to take over security over there at the lodge, so that they could all take a break to go to the mess hall?
Spencer:That would take a crazy roll. Here's my opinion. You guys distract them.
Harrison:It's going to be the same roll.
Spencer:You guys distract them and sneak around and I'm going to try to climb over something. Is there a fence surrounding the? I mean you could climb up the wall into a window. I guess I'm going to climb up into Barry's window.
Robot Voice:You don't know which room is his.
Spencer:We're going to go one by one until we find him. That would take like a hundred rolls. No, we would have to roll for every one, just that I successfully climbed up and then I could scale over.
Cayson:Is there anything related to bamboo near around? Not yet, not yet.
Spencer:Not yet.
Cayson:Dang. This skill is useful.
Robby:Yes, it is.
Spencer:I'll work some bamboo in there for you. I want to, okay, okay, so feed dork. I'm so happy right now. So you're three for bear and three for criminal. So I want you to go ahead and give me a roll, for so you have two chances. This is your skill, so you have to get a three or below. Would it be criminal, or would it be?
Robot Voice:bear.
Spencer:Depends on whether it succeeds or not. How does that work? So if the plan fails, it's plus one to bear, if it works, it's plus one to criminal. Okay, so that would technically make it a criminal task then? Well, they're both at three, so it doesn't matter. Well yeah, but it would technically.
Harrison:Yeah.
Spencer:Yeah.
Harrison:Okay, here we go so you have two chances. No money, no money, no money. One.
Spencer:Okay.
Robby:I'm the goat.
Spencer:So, Feednorc sees that there's an open window on the second floor and just scampers up the wall into it. But that means that the other two of you are still on the outside and still in a way to get in.
Robby:Yep.
Spencer:So what are you going to do? There's still guards all around, is there?
Robby:an ID badge scanner thing on the front of the lodge.
Spencer:But you have to show the guards your ID. If you pull up your fake RFID duplicator, they're going to know that you're not doing what you're supposed to do.
Robby:I know that, but I'm asking is that how you access inside the building?
Spencer:You don't know that yet. We can't see that there's a scanner. You can't see the inside of the building. You can only see the outside.
Robby:We can't see if there's a scanner on the front door.
Spencer:The front door is just a front door.
Cayson:Is there an obvious head honcho?
Spencer:Sure.
Cayson:I'm going to walk up to him and say, hey, it doesn't seem to be working for us. Can you try and reset the card reader for us?
Spencer:I just told you.
Cayson:there wasn't a card reader, there was like not at all. The front door is just guarded by guards. I'm just going to walk up to him and say, hey, we need to get in.
Spencer:Genius, that would be a criminal check.
Cayson:All right, you have to get a one.
Spencer:Bro's about to go feral, we can make this work to our advantage.
Robby:Okay, so get a one.
Spencer:Bro's about to go feral, we can make this work to our advantage. Okay, so get the dice I need you to roll.
Robby:So if he loses here, If he goes feral, does he just go on a killing spree with the bees? Wait, wait, wait.
Spencer:I'm going to give you guys an out here. You can add one point back to criminal by doing a flashback where you reveal that this was what your plan here is. So do you want to do that?
Harrison:What do you mean?
Spencer:by doing a flashback. Just pretend like we're doing a flashback in case it explains. Before you climbed into the window, he told you what his plan was here. Okay, gotcha. Gotcha. So everybody. So flashback Back to a few minutes ago. Colonel Mustard reveals his plan to get inside the building.
Cayson:So I'm thinking right, we need someone to get inside, someone to let us in, but we don't need all three of us. I'm thinking, can you?
Spencer:speak up, because there's no way that's going to come into the mic. We need three of us to get inside.
Cayson:Right, I'm thinking we don't need Well, we need someone to get inside if we don't need all three of us. So I'm thinking we get Keebler Feed Nork To climb into the window and unlock the door from the inside, and while we walk up, I am going to try and convince the guards unsuccessfully to let us in. They're going to pull out their pistols and shoot me, while Teddy can sneak into the door that was opened by Keebler, and so we can get most of our party inside.
Robby:See, but this is genius because every suicide attempt he's had.
Cayson:So far has failed.
Robot Voice:He just wants to die.
Spencer:Flash forward back into the present. So that means that, colonel Mustard, you've got to get a tour below. So do you get like one flashback per game. Is that what? It is Sure?
Robot Voice:Because otherwise it's super overpowered.
Spencer:The rules don't say that, but that's probably the only limit that would actually work Because otherwise, every time use a flashback.
Cayson:Yeah, just always use a flashback.
Spencer:I'm going to fail this I always fail.
Robby:I failed what did you get just for?
Cayson:curiosity. Oh no, wait a minute, you really failed.
Spencer:Yeah, okay, so you're like can I die? So you say you need to get inside and the guards are like you can't come in here. This is for the VIPs, for the most elite of the elites, the deepest of the deep state.
Cayson:You can't come in here. I'm a VIP. I'm a VIP bear, I'm a VIP bear.
Spencer:You're a bear, shoot me. Reach for his gun.
Cayson:Reach for the officer's gun.
Spencer:Wait, so would that be a criminal action or a bear action? Wait to reach for the gun.
Cayson:Well, here's my question, because Kase is now back at five and one.
Spencer:The rules are getting a little bit muddy. Here. Be a criminal action or a bear action. Wait to reach for the gun. Well, here's my question.
Cayson:Okay, this case is not back at five and one the rules are getting a little bit muddy here.
Spencer:Okay, so it added that extra point to criminal, and then do you just lose that point again. So he's still at five one. Yes, okay, so I guess that makes okay reset just a little. Look so every time the plan fails right? Uh, you move one point from criminal to bear. If it succeeds, one point from bear to criminal.
Spencer:So if it, works plus one to criminal. If it doesn't work plus one to bear, Well, I feel like this has got to be criminal, because if this is a bear and you're successful, buddy, you're done for. So I need you to be careful with what you choose here.
Cayson:I'm going to actually pass it off to Teddy. I'm going to have I'm going to pass it off to Teddy and I'm going to have Teddy reach for the officer's gun. No, I'm going to have Teddy grab my hand and then push my hand towards the officer's gun and I'm going to growl at them very loudly to try to terrify them.
Spencer:Please reach for the officer's gun while you're doing that. Okay, so that would be. I mean, I guess you could theoretically Please reach for the officer's gun while you're doing that. Okay, so that would be. I mean, I guess you could theoretically do it, because your luck has been so bad with lower numbers.
Harrison:So you need to get a four or below Okay.
Robby:Do I get two rolls or one? Oh, I got a one, so you got a one the first try.
Spencer:Okay, so Teddy growls, sets the bears or the bee guards sort of off balance and then grabs their gun. Yes, please Shoot the other bee. This is not a silenced weapon.
Robby:Even better.
Spencer:Oh wait, so hold on. So you succeeded. So the plan just worked.
Robby:So that would move one point.
Spencer:The plan just worked, so it would be plus one to criminal.
Robby:Oh yeah, because we're perfectly balanced again.
Spencer:You're back to balance. So you're at three and three. What'd you roll A one? Oh?
Robby:you rolled a half, he got the one?
Spencer:yeah, so are you gonna. Are you shooting them? I don't know. He's the one that. Yeah, so are you shooting them.
Robby:I don't know. He's the one that grabbed the gun, so you gave it to him.
Harrison:Okay.
Spencer:Cason.
Cayson:Yes sir.
Spencer:Sorry, Colonel Mustard, you're at five for bear and one for criminal.
Cayson:I'm going to take the gun Shooting them would be the criminal action. But I'm going to take the gun and I am going to point it at my head.
Spencer:No, this does not help anybody.
Cayson:And I'm going to say let me in, or else I will shoot myself.
Spencer:But why would we care about that?
Cayson:All right, I'm going to shoot one of them, just to make a point.
Harrison:So you shoot one of them, just to make a point.
Spencer:So you shoot one of them. Wait, wait, so I think Wait first.
Cayson:does the gun look like that, are you?
Harrison:going to eat it.
Spencer:Yes, so first you said I'll shoot myself. And they said, why would we care? So you just turn the gun on he goes.
Harrison:yeah, you're right Okay.
Cayson:Does the gun look like bamboo, because I feel like it could go off in my stomach and that would achieve my role you know what?
Spencer:No, this specific officer is a big fan of the color scheme of bamboo.
Cayson:Oh bet.
Spencer:He had his firearm painted to look like bamboo Cason. If you kill yourself, we win nothing out of this.
Cayson:You may not win, but I do.
Harrison:There's no benefit here.
Robot Voice:It doesn't help us get in the building.
Spencer:It screws Teddy because Teddy's friend just killed himself. And then now you're standing here with all the orange cards Eat the gun you can carry my corpse inside.
Cayson:So, that means that you need to get a oh my gosh Wait.
Spencer:If this works, don't you have to roll. If this works, you go feral.
Cayson:No, if it works, I go criminal.
Robby:No it's a bear action, it. No. If it works, I go criminal. No, it's a bear action. It's a bear action. Eating bamboo is a bear action.
Cayson:No, because if you succeed in any plan, it's criminal. If you fail any plan, it's bear.
Spencer:No, I thought it was, if it's a bear action and it succeeds, you add a point to bear. Yes, if it fails, you lose a point.
Cayson:So you theoretically only have to roll. No, this is genius. Yes, wait, wait, wait. I want to eat the gun.
Spencer:So if you.
Robby:You have to roll a six to fail, so the number.
Harrison:It balances out. So you're rolling for a bear action.
Spencer:If it works, if you succeed, the plan works, you add one to criminal. If it doesn't work, you add one to bear. That is've thought that did not feel like what we were doing earlier it's not, but that's what the rule said, and I'm illiterate, so we're gonna try to switch to that here. But because, I think that actually gives case in a way to live, and I don't want him to die so it's a bear action.
Spencer:So you would have to get a five or below and if it works, you would get a point back into criminal okay, wait okay, hold on, so you would if the works, plus one to criminal If it doesn't work plus one to bear.
Cayson:No, I get what you're saying, but I'm Honestly, that makes a lot more sense because otherwise you stray off of three and three and you're screwed.
Spencer:Yeah.
Cayson:So it's just about making sure that you're balanced.
Spencer:Please put your mic near your face.
Cayson:I feel like I've been talking really loud no actually, yeah, I feel like, yeah, I understand that Okay. So, Keebler could you hold?
Spencer:a five.
Cayson:Could you hold the box while I roll?
Spencer:So you have two chances to get a five or below. I think you're going to make this.
Robby:He better Gets two sixes in a row.
Cayson:I got one, let's go.
Spencer:Okay, so Thank you, so I keep forgetting your name. Kern Just goes crazy and decides that the gun looks like bamboo and just eats the gun. So that means that you are now at four and two.
Cayson:Honestly, those rules make a lot more sense.
Spencer:It also makes sense because it's like the more in touch you are with your bear side, the less likely you are to turn on your friends and stuff.
Harrison:I mean it?
Spencer:makes sense from a game perspective too I think.
Cayson:But that is not what we were doing. That is not at all what we did.
Robot Voice:We just switched.
Spencer:It's fine.
Cayson:There's a whole lot of game left.
Spencer:We haven't even gotten to the cemetery yet.
Cayson:Sir, that's my favorite portion. Can? I keep the gun going off until we get there.
Spencer:What are you going to hold it in your gut? A specific way.
Robby:Yes, I think you should have to roll to see if it goes off or not.
Spencer:Not right now. We'll wait for a dramatic moment where you really need him, where it hits the lower intestine.
Cayson:You started to digest the gun.
Spencer:Okay, so you ate the officer's gun.
Robot Voice:It's a ticking time bomb now.
Spencer:But now you have nothing.
Robot Voice:You have nothing. There's no leverage. Weren't there multiple officers? The rest of them have weapons. The rest of them also have nothing. You have nothing. There's no leverage. Weren't there multiple?
Spencer:officers.
Cayson:The rest of them have weapons, the rest of them also have weapons. So now I tell the guy oh man, I thought you were giving me food. Oh man, I thought you were giving me food, oh crap. There's a medic inside right. Let me in please.
Spencer:I'm going to die. So this would be a criminal check for you to do that, so you'd have to get a two or below, or Teddy could do it. What?
Cayson:now you're switching back to the original.
Spencer:No no, no, no, no. You're trying to do a criminal action, so to succeed in that criminal action, it would be a two or below oh, I see what you're doing okay or Teddy could do it where it'd be a three or below yeah, no.
Cayson:I think he wants to say my friend swallowed a gun. My friend, yeah, my friend needs a doctor because I can't speak. I am like trying to trying to scarf it down he's still choking on the gun.
Spencer:I'm angry and I'm like this big gun shaped lump in my throat and these guys are supposed to help you you reached for their gun and then swallowed it. And they're supposed to care enough to let you in after he threatened to kill you. Well, the first thing he did was say we need in. So, like they know, it was part of a plan to get into the building. Why would they let him into the building?
Robot Voice:and then.
Spencer:I'm over here like look what you've done to my friend for the sake of the game, we'll just say that they'll fall for it.
Cayson:To be fair, I never pointed it at them, I've only pointed it at myself.
Spencer:No, you said. You pointed it at them afterwards.
Cayson:Well, no, because I said I shot them and I never actually did that roll.
Robby:So I've just pointed it at myself.
Spencer:I'm going to take him out. Okay, well, you're. I'm chilling right now. Yeah, your feed. Dork is inside already. He has no idea what's going on. I have no idea what's happening. Okay, so, Teddy, go ahead and roll me a three or below.
Robot Voice:Six oh my god, they're not letting us in.
Spencer:Okay, so that's plus one to bear. So Harrison is now at four and two. Okay, so what they do? They put you in handcuffs and escort you inside the building, because they want to let Barry figure out what to do with you. I could break these cuffs. They've got a special room prepped at the bottom floor.
Robby:Are they made for bees?
Spencer:I mean no. Three foot tall bees, they assume bears would be the one to try to rob this place.
Harrison:Okay.
Spencer:They're bear-sized handcuffs, so they have you in the handcuffs. They're leading you towards the holding cell that they keep.
Cayson:I like that. We're very clearly bears in bee costumes and they're like yeah, lock up these bees, let's take them to Barry.
Spencer:So they throw you in the holding cell and lock the door behind them and then they say we'll let Barry figure out what to do with you or how to deal with you in the morning.
Robby:He's not feral, no, okay.
Spencer:He's at four and two right now. You guys are both at four and two.
Robby:If I go feral, does that give me advantage with breaking out?
Spencer:No, it just means that you would probably end up killing Colonel Lester in the process.
Cayson:So what do I do to get him feral?
Spencer:For the sake of time. The bars sort of look like bamboo. They're not actually bamboo, they just look like bamboo.
Cayson:Alright, I think I have an idea. I am going to roll to pretend like I'm dying and like scream and see if Barry will come and get me Barry's asleep. They said he'll deal with you in the morning.
Spencer:That's why I'm screaming, but they're not going to go get him for that. If you're dying, that's what they want.
Harrison:Barry.
Cayson:I need you.
Spencer:Barry doesn't care if this bee dies, if this bear dies, so I think your best bet is probably to eat the bars.
Cayson:No, I think you're right.
Spencer:So that'd be a four or below.
Cayson:I'm going to try and pick the lock.
Spencer:What Eat the lock? That'd be a two or below. Two or below. If you try to pick the lock, that's not your skill.
Robby:That'd be a criminal action.
Spencer:So that'd be a two or below. If you try to eat the lock, that would be a four or below.
Cayson:I'm going to eat the lock. I'm going to make it seem like we somehow, like magically, escaped. So the whole jail cell is still intact, but somehow the lock is gone.
Spencer:So you're not just going to eat the lock. There's not any guards in the door. They left you. I'm going to try.
Cayson:Okay, if that's the case, I'm just going All the bars, eat the whole door.
Robby:Yeah.
Spencer:Okay, so that means you get two chances to get a four or below.
Robby:Four below okay. It's going to be really interesting that moment when Spencer just goes and now it's hit your lower intestine.
Spencer:So Cason are you?
Robby:constipated or do you vomit?
Spencer:Cason for the first time in a long time is at three and three. Kaysen has reached perfect balance once more. That's cool.
Cayson:Skadoosh, if you will.
Spencer:Colonel Mustard devours the bars of the cell door like it's nothing. The guards are gone. They went back to their post outside.
Robby:Perfect.
Spencer:You guys are inside the building now.
Robby:Free to roam.
Spencer:So this is where Feednork finally comes running back.
Robby:He hears the commotion of you heating the bars. He's been looking for Barry this whole time right?
Harrison:Yes.
Robby:Should he roll to see if he found him or not, or did he find him?
Spencer:I actually like the idea of having him roll.
Robby:Okay.
Spencer:Okay. So Feednor comes running in. He sees Colonel Mustard with a belly full of cell door right now he doesn't know if I'm a bee or a bear.
Cayson:He has to roll to find out.
Spencer:So he also doesn't know that you ate a gun a minute ago because he wasn't there.
Cayson:Oh, yeah, so he's going to try to figure out if I'm a, b, no, so he's going to figure out.
Spencer:This would be criminal, right, yeah, so you're going to figure out whether you were able to see which room Barry is in. Does my climbing affect this, because I feel like me scaling the walls looking through windows. You climbed in earlier but oh, okay, it's worth a shot, right.
Robby:So you have, but you're at three and three, so balanced.
Cayson:Yeah.
Spencer:Kacen also got back to 3 and 3 while you were gone, and so theoretically, this would give me an extra bear stat. If it works it'd be an extra criminal stat, so that'd be 4. We're gonna have to go over these rolls. If it works plus 1 to criminal.
Robot Voice:If it doesn't plus 1 to bear.
Cayson:I get what you're saying.
Robot Voice:Yeah.
Spencer:So 3 or below. I got a 2. I got a two.
Robot Voice:You got a two. Okay, nice, so Feedenork comes in.
Spencer:No, this is not food. No, sir. And Feedenork says that he's actually in room 502. Go ahead and say that, Feedenork. What's up with the gut?
Robot Voice:Barry's in room 502. He's got a gun.
Cayson:Believe it or not, I have eaten probably like three tons of bamboo in the last hour.
Spencer:Anyways, 502. 502. So you guys all climb to the elevator. So you're riding in the elevator, you get to floor five, you go to 502. Now you have the key card for the other doors. But let's just say, for the sake of time, that it works. So you put your fake key card up to the badge thingy and it goes beep and the door opens. Nice, now the lights are all off in the room. So you open the door and you notice that Barry's suite is actually quite fancy. There's a mini bar stocked with cold beverages, beaverages, a pile of fresh towels and even a microwave. Barry is lying in bed watching a movie on TV. However, something doesn't look quite right instead of being, you know, bee sized.
Spencer:He looks about 5 foot 11. He doesn't look much like a bee at all. In fact, the best way you can think to describe him is that he looks like a guy you saw on TV once wearing a bee costume. What was his name? Terry?
Cayson:Cherry, is that the guy from Toy Story 2? Something like that that was trying to sell To an owl To an owl.
Spencer:No, that was a chicken soup. A 5'11 TV star who famously played a bee named Barry.
Cayson:I'm gonna roll to seduce him. I'm gonna walk up to him and say you like jazz?
Spencer:He's got something to say to you. First he goes um, it's not what it looks like. I was just doing some method acting to get ready for Bee Movie 2. And they accepted me as their leader. I'm a divine figure to them now, you see, like some sort of bee messiah, I'm leading them all into a new future where honey production is the most profitable industry in the world. I won't need to make Pop-Tart movies for Netflix anymore. I'll be king of the entire world, or I guess I'd technically be the queen, since Bee Society is actually matriarchal. What's the deal with that? Yeah, I've had enough of the yapping. I'm going to take off after him and tackle him.
Cayson:He hasn't gone anywhere, has he? He's still laying in bed.
Spencer:Okay, I'm going to put my hand on his throat.
Cayson:I'm going to feel the orientation of the gun in my stomach, Sit on him with the gun facing him and I'm going to squeeze. You're going to kill him. You need information. I'm going to kill both of us. No, no, no In one fell swoop.
Spencer:No, I'm not letting him do that. No, actually, what's going to happen is I'm going to tackle Kern, and while I do, you need to terrify Jerry. I guess Where's the honey? I've completely tackled the current into the wall at this point, by the way. Okay, so Harrison, you're going to have to give me a four or below. You got two chances to get it, okay.
Robby:That was a six and that was a one.
Spencer:Does that count as a?
Robby:roll. Yeah, I didn't mean to roll it yet, but it rolled Technically yes, so you terrify Barry into giving information.
Spencer:So he starts shaking. He's like don't hurt me, please Don't hurt me. The honey is in the cemetery. It's in the cemetery. Take us there. Don't you need the code for the keypad? Ask him what the code is.
Robby:Yes, take us there.
Spencer:No, just ask him. We don't need this guy anymore. Ask him what the code is. But if we use him as a cover, no, no, no you guys are getting it wrong.
Cayson:We have a car battery and jumper cables for just this reason.
Spencer:Hey, you're right, shut up, buddy, don't ask you tried to clinch on top of Jerry buddy. I'm holding you down right now. Are you using the car battery on him to keep him from shooting him?
Robby:No because, it might ignite the bullet.
Spencer:Wait, no, no, no, no, Robbie, I'm going to need you to roll me a criminal, check it's. Keebler, get it right. Feed dork, I'm going to need you to roll me a criminal check because you've attached the car battery to Colonel Mustard. I didn't choose this life, though You're choosing it for me.
Robot Voice:That's what you said, no Wait what?
Spencer:Also, I'm going to need you to roll a check to keep him from shooting. Are you happy You're single-handedly sabotaging us?
Cayson:I'm going to be fatally wounded if you fail this I'm going to have like 20 minutes to live.
Spencer:I'm bleeding out.
Robby:We literally had everything we needed and you decided you were going to try to kill Jerry. So three or below. We're going to leave you there with Jerry while we go get the honey.
Robot Voice:It's a six.
Spencer:Okay wait, but I climbed on top of him.
Cayson:No, but I'm Give me another roll. I'm sitting on him.
Harrison:I put my bare nuts on your head.
Spencer:I get another roll, do it again, you'll fail.
Cayson:I'm willing it on you right now. Come on, frank Blow on it.
Harrison:That's what I'm talking about he failed again. Yeah.
Spencer:What'd you get? Just out of curiosity, it was a five, five. So Fiendork is on top, he's wrestling.
Cayson:He's wrestling Colonel Buster. I say no.
Spencer:He said don't shoot, don't shoot.
Cayson:And then, in one fatal moment, I clenched.
Spencer:So you clenched, hold on, just to add another layer to this. It's a Robbie. Robbie failed, so that means it would be.
Cayson:There's a nine mil hole in my stomach where my belly button seems to be Hold on Cason or Colonel.
Spencer:I'm going to need you to roll to see if the gun goes off.
Cayson:Oh okay, yeah, because you're attempting to do it. What is this? A criminal act? It's definitely not a bear act.
Spencer:It's three.
Cayson:So you're going to get three or below. But the gun looks like bamboo.
Spencer:You already ate it. It doesn't matter, I got to find that so he tries to pull the trigger in his stomach and it doesn't work no it never worked, pathetic.
Robot Voice:Sounds like a skill.
Cayson:It never worked. No, it never worked. Pathetic, so Sounds like a skill issue. Teddy still has a barrier to headlock right now, you failed to remove me from Jay's body and I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it.
Spencer:You don't have the balls, buddy. So Teddy still has barrier to headlock right now. He's like are you done? Can I give you some more information now? Would you like to know the code? Yes, I want to know. We want to know the code. Teddy, ask for the code dude.
Robby:Give us the code.
Spencer:Should I have it roll again?
Cayson:No, we already terrified.
Spencer:The code is the release date for the B movie 112, 2007. Write that down, somebody. This is going to be the most traumatic experience of this guy's life.
Cayson:Someone is threatening him. Someone else jumps on him. It's clenching his stomach uncontrollably. Someone else jumps on top of that Large B and chokes him out. We got what we needed. Throw him over the balcony on him. It's clenching his stomach uncontrollably. Jumps on top of that large bee and chokes him out.
Spencer:We got what we needed. Throw him over the balcony. I've had enough. That would be a criminal action, or should we? Here's my thing.
Robby:He's going to tell people he's going to call security the moment you leave.
Spencer:We've got to kill him. We've got to know what their option is, but to kill this unnamed actor.
Robot Voice:We can't do that. I'm sorry. Can I scare him into a heart attack?
Robby:You can scare him unconscious.
Cayson:What if we just crippled him? What if we?
Spencer:just crippled him and we didn't kill him From a height that far. You're only not going to walk again, You'll still live From a height that far.
Cayson:you're only not going to walk again, You'll still live. Can we put him under cardiac arrest?
Spencer:No, I think we throw him over and make him look like an accident. Two Okay.
Robby:That scared him unconscious.
Spencer:So that means you're back at three and three, you're welcome. So, teddy, lets out a loud roar. Give me your best roar, either or and Barry is so terrified by that he passes out. But as he's slipping in consciousness, he's like I should warn you, this camp is haunted the cemetery. There was a bee who drowned in the lake in 1957.
Cayson:How long is it Can I punch him? He's taking a long time to go out.
Spencer:Is this the plot to Friday the 13th? Is that what you did here? Is that what you did here? I already guessed. I can't confirm?
Harrison:Are we going to have to fight Jason? I don't want to fight Jason.
Robby:Barry passes out after giving you that warning, great we have to defeat an immortal oh my god, keep going next time on.
Robot Voice:Sorry, we tried.
Robby:I'm gonna drink the immortal stuff I'm gonna tackle him.
Spencer:We're this is not happening. You know what? I'm not doing this anymore. This is the last time we're doing this. You are not immortal at all and you just fought an immortal being. Let's go. I'm on fire. It's the curse he whispers. Jason vorbese is back for revenge after all these years.
Robot Voice:These weren't just innocent bystanders. These were enemies who felt the wrath of God's backhand when tough love must get even tougher. God's backhand when evil plays rough. God can play rougher.
